Get a life.
In the news today, PETA is going after the Wimbleton Tournament because they hired marksman to shoot pidgeons. The Tournament actually has pet hawks that scare away most of the pidgeons, but a few slipped through and were landing on the tennis courts and food courts. So, they killed them. They killed the pidgeons, the birds nicknamed "rats with wings." And poor little PETA thinks that is cruel. So I would like to say some things to PETA on behalf of the people of America that agree with me.
1. Why are you even watching tennis?
2. Pidgeons are one of the most disgusting, disease carrying animals and they were in the food court. It is a health issue, and who cares if we kill three... there are billions of them.
3. They are not torturing the birds... they just shoot them. It is more humane than the electric chair... that we strap humans to.
4. No body likes you. Anyone who is not a card-carrying member of PETA thinks you are rediculous. Why? Of all the issues in the world today, the PEOPLE dying all over the world... you are concerned with pidgeons.
5. Get a life. That is all.
@ PETA
Hybrids....and why I'm being screwed by the ones I trusted.
Over the coarse of the four years I have owned my Toyota Matrix, I have fallen in love with it. It is more than just the normal maintenance, love/hate relationship every man inherently has with his vehicle. There is just something there between a man and his car that is different from the connection a woman has with her car. He doesn't even have to be a "car guy" to have this tangled web of loathing and love for the vehicle he has been through so much with. But on the other hand, my relationship with The Matrix borders on unhealthy.
In fact, I refer to it as "The Matrix" and probably don't go one week with out vocalizing to someone (usually Charissa) about being genuinely impressed by it. The head room, the versatility, the cargo room, the sleek design, and the wall outlet on my dashboard... these are just a few of my favorite things.
But Alas, I'm not what you would consider a "good driver" and The Matrix has taken some scrapes here and there. So I took it to Toyota, the makers who introduced the two of us and they stroked The Matrix lovingly and said, "We can fix her... make her whole again. And we can do it for around $700." I agreed and then left in a rental Prius Hybrid.
I really don't like this car. Hybrid or not, its like driving a golf cart. It is so unsafe. The blind spots are terrible and the climate control is overbearing, but I can't take my eyes off the touch screen on the dash. It shows me the current MPG I'm getting at all times. I'm not even watching the roads or the speed limits, just the screen. It's like a video game. The better MPG, the higher the score. And when I only put 5 gallons of gas in it... that was 3/4 of a tank. Glory sweet glory.
The Matrix is still not fixed... and Toyota is sicking it to me with a bill that is almost double what they started with. I started off mad. But now I feel like a parent with a child held for ransom. "I'll pay anything you want, just bring The Matrix home... just bring it home." God, I'm sick.
Combo points
"I'm afraid if I tell you what it is... you won't even try it." - Dr. Hannibal Lector
As I sojourn on this earth, I find my self eating food that appears strange, maybe even repulsive, yet turns out to be pleasantly surprising. There are a number of strange dishes I have tried, but I'm fascinated most by the dishes resulting in the combination of two unlikely heroes. The odd couple de jour so to speak.
Today I ate my Wendy's fries (which are not particularly great) with a chocolate frostie (which is simple chocolate soft-serve). Apart, they are too salty or too ho hum. But together they create an explosion of taste on your palette. The same is true of McDonald's french fries with McDonald's sweet and sour sauce, or Monical's pizza with Monical's french dressing! It's the combinations that make these foods truly great.
What I'm trying to say is that I'm really hungry... someone get me some Monical's pizza!
Monogamy... the duct tape for the world.
I love duct tape. It literally fixes everything but duct work.
When people ask me why I am a Christian, my immediate response is "Well, it would be awkward for me to go into work if I wasn't." (I am a minister). But being a smart-elic aside, I tend to think that the Bible contains in it all the fundamentals to having a great life and a wonderful society. I mean, call me crazy, but I believe that practices that are deemed as "moral" or "biblical" in the Judeo-Christian sense of the word are actually just good business as far as world affairs go. Let's take for instance Monogamy...
Monogamy: "Traditionally" this is the practice of only taking one sexual partner.
Ideally, a boy and girl meet, they get married and only have sex with that person until one of them dies. At that point the surviving person may take another sexual partner until they die. Etc. Etc. Etc.
On the downside, we may have to exercise some self-control.
On the plus side, if this is practiced globally, it would eliminate ALL sexually transmitted diseases. You could wipe out AIDS, herpes, pretty much everything but pubic lice. You have to shower to do that. You would reduce the number of unwed mothers to only those widowed. No more rape, no more divorces screwing up kids, no more affairs tearing apart marriages, no more prostitution.
It is crazy to think about what would happen if everyone could just agree to do this one thing. But rather than keep it in our pants we would rather donate money to AIDS relief and take pills so it doesn't burn when we pee. Oh, well.