Hindsight

The first girl I ever dated broke up with me after I spent three months dating, two years persuing, and one hundred dollars on a class ring she could wear.  It was sad really.  I thought it was going great, so of coarse when went to her house to pick her up and found out we weren't "going anywhere" ... let's just say I didn't see it coming.  I did what every man (of 16) does in that situation.  I got out of there as quick as I could with commits like "if that is how you feel..." and "no big deal..."  "...still be close friends..."  so that I could cry in my car on the way home.

Lately, my wife and I have been trying to console kids that we mentor through their respective drama.   It is just surprising how stupid and insignificant high school romance seems, but on the other hand... kids these days cut themselves, develop eating disorders, and commit suicide because they can't see past it.  Anyway it got my wife and I thinking about previous break ups and I was curious if anyone had any good stories they want to share.  Some of mine include...

1.  Breaking up with me the day after an "appreciation dinner" for the guys.

2.  I broke up with a girl and she thought it was because she didn't know who Weezer was.

3.  I broke up with a girl, then tried to get back with her, then wrote her nasty e-mail then....

4.  I told a girl she needed to decide if she was serious about the relationship or not.  I then broke up with her a few days later before she could tell me that she decided to be serious.

As you can tell I'm not very good at this...

Atypical Spring Post

The Latin lover "Fernando Ortega" has come to town and he has one thing on his mind.

While others may be confused by the "variety" of the weather we have been having, there is no doubt in my mind that spring time is upon us. I can vouch for the validity of this belief based on the twiterpation of the whore next door. Not three week after Tabby had her kittens, Fernando arrived. Spring herself (my neighbor) told me they were ready to have Tabby neutered, but twelve hours later the noises started. It was a very strange sound for a cat to make. So, like a stranger with candy, I lured Tabby into the house and gave her some milk. She seemed fine, but my ignorance was not in her health, but in her state of mind.

Fernando was not so ignorant. Out of the spring mists came the most hansom orange cat I have ever seen. What seemed like a sweet moment quickly became awkward as our window well become a den of fornication. With the coming of Fernando Ortega (as my wife and I decided to name him) it quickly became "Business Time". This time of spring love continued ALL DAY LONG.

It was not only embarrassing to hear the two exhibitionists but in a way I felt responsible. I felt like the neighbor's daughter was being knocked up under my roof. Or worse, in my window well.

Today Tabby was locked in the garage making all kinds of noises while the star-crossed lover Fernando hovered outside the garage door. Will Tabby get the operation? Is she already pregnant again? Will Spring tear them apart? Only time will tell.